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Thanks for writing so you’re able to united states. We realize how hard it is to make experience out-of arguments which can be grounded so much more inside social and you may private tastes and you will smaller into the spiritual and you will ethical prices. Comment a number of the facts i present below so that you can come to some decision on what we wish to handle this dilemma along with your parents.
First, during certain universities regarding think a good Muslim woman should have new consent regarding their wali (guardian) to locate married, there’s strong contract you to a good Muslim people is get married without the permission regarding their parents. We would like to state first, yet not, that we are located in no way recommending that Muslims disregard the central character one to parents can be and ought to enjoy on the relationships procedure. Although not, as in your own circumstances, the mother and father is actually insisting toward a certain views that is not served when you look at the Islam, i.age. declining a candidate to have wedding mainly based purely on racial and cultural considerations.
2nd, based on everything wrote, we think your mothers may not just be concentrating on competition and people, nonetheless they possess other appropriate inquiries also. Why don’t we focus on your own admission that you will be “perhaps not a perfect Muslim.” We are not yes the method that you are employing the word “primary,” and is also possible that you and your mothers in addition to differ about how “perfect” an effective Muslim you’re. As you are seeking to wed a female who’s now Christian it is looking to revert so you’re able to Islam, your parents may also be concerned that religion will suffer as you are not “perfect” in your behavior today and you can she’ll feel just starting in mastering concerning the faith.
A unique options would be the fact your parents are inextricably connecting Islam that have Turkish culture, we.elizabeth. getting Turkish is equivalent to getting Muslim. Once again, they’re not alone in this manner because the most people off additional countries has actually similar impression. The theory is to assist your mother and father realize that folks of most of the racial and you will cultural record normally and you will would become Muslims. Such as for example reverts must simply stop the individuals aspects of the cultures that are explicitly forbidden in Islam, we.elizabeth. alcohol consumption, consuming pork, and you can ancestral worship simply to SingleSlavic’ta sohbet ne kadar? identity a few. Almost every other aspects of the society regarding supply can also be and must become chose should they can be found in line having Islamic theories. Your mother and father you will getting threatened that your particular coming children cannot become coached Turkish culture since their mommy isn’t Turkish.
Third, we desire your to not ever characterize this dilemma you are facing once the a both otherwise, we.elizabeth. either you to go a beneficial sin because of the disobeying your mother and father and you may marrying so it lady or you to go a good sin because of the “blindly” obeying your mother and father and not marrying that it woman. The reality associated with problem is you is held accountable for all your valuable procedures as well as how your carry out those ideas. The trouble regarding obeying your mother and father is a valid that, however you was an adult mature and will be held responsible for your steps. Islam provides you with the legal right to get married an excellent righteous Muslim lady without consent of the mothers, while it is strongly recommended getting your own parents’ true blessing just like the you move forward with the marriage. Don’t believe cracking out of the relationships along with your parents simply to get married so it woman. You actually have an obligation to support members of the family hence, you should do everything in your ability to come calmly to some mutual wisdom with your parents about it topic.
Finally, you have to do that which you is also to save clear traces off telecommunications along with your parents to allow them to just remember that , your do not want to dump either Islam otherwise Turkish people. They need to pay attention to away from you which you have this purpose in your mind. Help them to know which you plus future spouse usually struggle not only to be good Muslims, however, that you’ll do everything it is possible to to maintain the fresh Turkish society as well. Perhaps, you can decelerate marrying that it lady for some weeks so she can make the decision being a great Muslim and also initiate doing the religion. As a good Muslim, in the event that she will provides uniform correspondence together with your moms and dads, possibly that may help your mother and father to be more comfortable with their coming child-in-law. Make a lot of du’aa (supplication) so you can Allah (swt) and you will Istikhara (prayer having pointers) and you will find His (swt) ssistance as you make your ultimate decision. And Allah (swt) knows greatest.
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